This is life.

I must learn to cope with loneliness. I must learn to lead without the aid of a companionship. After all it is me who lives my life, not anyone else. It is with great displeasure to say that I am something worthless as of now. The things I have done which has affected a few along the way should have merited a great degree of bad karma to punish me with. All this has been my very own doing and I am certainly not proud of it. This is life. If you do not know how to control it, it will control you. It has made me a sad little boy not knowing how to control my life. All this while i've been doing as i've pleased but I have not fully felt life to the fullest. It is still very much empty. My whole life is revolved around pessimism, anger, sadness and disappointment. But I can change all that, I must learn to lead life on my own.